Author Topic: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition  (Read 106650 times)

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Offline Gollumkip

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #900 on: September 28, 2014, 11:42:13 pm »
o gollum plz tell
I don't want to start any shit storms just yet, other shit storm stirrer feel free to go ahead. I just didn't want to say anything without an okay from you and we are in the middle of a texting time rift.
Here's where I come in. I just talked to HM and she's pregnant, "probably with gollums baby." She said he wants to be part of his kids life but her husband is going to be on the birth certificate, so it will have two dads, lol. Also she said gollum is already stepping up by getting her an ecig so she can quit smoking. All in all, its a fucking bizarre turn of events, but that's what happens when TRTers meet. I'm glad Dose Me or Gun Lover didn't get pregnant after I met them.
this is all absolutely 100% correct- I was gonna wait for hydro to text back but we are in a time rift and she isn't getting any of my texts (happens). I suppose it was only a matter of time before you posted but yes, it's all true. Let the shit storm commence!
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Offline Midnight Sun

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #901 on: September 28, 2014, 11:50:12 pm »
Yeah this is all a really stupid troll, remember when jerome "got pregnant?"

 :rolleyes2: :jerkoff:
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Offline mashleshmash

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #902 on: September 28, 2014, 11:51:52 pm »
derp
unwyred: have you sucked dick for heroin?

 apric0t: maybe i tried and didnt like it

Offline 1337

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #903 on: September 28, 2014, 11:55:49 pm »
Yeah this is all a really stupid troll, remember when jerome "got pregnant?"

 :rolleyes2: :jerkoff:
No dude, an internet stranger gave me her word. It can't be a lie, she stopped talking to me because I said one good thing about having a mexican baby is that it will work on her farm.

Offline Gollumkip

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #904 on: September 29, 2014, 12:01:34 am »
*grins a wide grin*
8=====D

Offline Midnight Sun

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #905 on: September 29, 2014, 12:02:05 am »
Yeah this is all a really stupid troll, remember when jerome "got pregnant?"

 :rolleyes2: :jerkoff:
No dude, an internet stranger gave me her word. It can't be a lie, she stopped talking to me because I said one good thing about having a mexican baby is that it will work on her farm.

I've spent the last 2 hours with a faceful of gasoline, my mental faculties aren't 100% here right now
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Offline Midnight Sun

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #906 on: September 29, 2014, 12:03:19 am »
also, mexicans working


jajajajajajajaja
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Offline Midnight Sun

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #907 on: September 29, 2014, 12:04:58 am »
btw does anyone know if there's a spark plug standard that isn't 5/8"

I could not for the life of me get my 5/8"s plug socket around the fkn plug.  Went up in size and they just spun freely... so I'm rather lost, didn't want to try and force the socket on for fear of smashing the ceramic

I should specify it isn't a metric hex... I went up in increments of SAE/Metric/SAE etc
« Last Edit: September 29, 2014, 12:12:41 am by Midnight Sun »
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Offline John Smith

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #908 on: September 29, 2014, 12:45:37 am »
Something went fucky with my PS3 the other day and I couldn't connect it to the internet for 2 days, just managed to fix it. Felt like I was going through crack withdrawal.

Also Malice I'm playing Destiny now so you can't say I only play TLOU anymore.

Some time this month DNSCrypt fucked up my internet, but I wasn't sure if it was a problem with the network because it wouldn't work in linux either.

What a sad fucking state I was in, I think it kept me from going outside and showering. I do not like being out of the data stream, not knowing what's going on in the world, feeling unconnected. I like to at least check Reddit before going outside just in case WW3 has started, or there's something dangerous going on locally. I would honestly have no idea it was happening if I didn't have internet access, unless they were blaring out siren warnings.

Damn I think my fuckin cat got worms or something, whole bunch of these little yellow inchworm things started crawling on my living room carpet

Once I had a horde of maggots crawling out from under the stove towards the computer desk, they must have hatched en masse. I had to keep going back and fully squishing them, replete with wonderful tactile feedback, a nice wet pop of skin tearing and innards being expelled.

Also she said gollum is already stepping up by getting her an ecig so she can quit smoking.

I've had the odd urge to send people Christmas presents at times, but my mind went through the possibilities and it seemed either no one really deserved anything or they had enough money to buy it themselves.

Maybe I should send her a starter kit, a good vape and some liquid. Show everyone up.

Offline Gollumkip

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #909 on: September 29, 2014, 01:47:47 am »
I already sent her a vape and a bunch of liquid which she's already puffing on, you're too late.
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Offline WS

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #910 on: September 29, 2014, 01:53:52 am »
If I don't like that ho I turn her ass into a frisbee
If I dont like your disc I turn that ho into a frisbee
I throw it out on Old Nat, right by the Wendy's!

*cruises thru the ATL*

Offline hydromorphone

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #911 on: September 29, 2014, 01:58:18 am »
Yeah... might as well say it. Unlike GollyWholly.. I dont troll and wouldnt like this.. I am infact pregnant. Ive (for the most part) been smoking waaater vapor..which is not nearly as enjoyable as fire and smoke..

Anyway.. whats up?

Offline Piles of Crack

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #912 on: September 29, 2014, 02:03:06 am »
Damn, and I thought MY dad was a deadbeat.

Offline mojo4567

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #913 on: September 29, 2014, 02:04:24 am »
I already sent her a vape and a bunch of liquid which she's already puffing on, you're too late.

I dont understand how anyone can actually use vapors. They seem like the nerdy equivalent of the smoking world.
[size=22pt] 420 [/size]
[size=18pt] BIGGIE SMALLS [/size]
[size=12pt] SKATEBOARDING [/size]

Offline John Smith

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Re: The retarded thread: Send zok back to africa edition
« Reply #914 on: September 29, 2014, 02:08:42 am »
Duke, maybe you should get on SSI. Everyone else is doing it: http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/490/trends-with-benefits

I am infact pregnant.

You'd better be joking. Do you know about heritability? Nearly everyone on Zoklet should sterilize themselves.

Jesus fuck, your life is already bad enough, just imagine how utterly White trash and inescapably hopeless you would become with a child. What kind of life is it going to have? For the love of life, get an abortion ASAP.