I used to wear a shirt in school that simply said....."I'm not arrogant, I'm just better than you."
My personal belief in the true differences, is the way a truly confident person carries themselves. Some are just more low-key and passive about their success and confidence, where others are more brash and verbose about it....which oftentimes delves into the realm of being arrogant.
Personally Obbe, I ain't buying much of how you define what you believe to be "arrogant" people....because I think its just someone's way that is either insecure or jealous of said person to try to minimize how good they really are. Trying to read into a lot of psycho mumbo jumbo and put in on their character, as a way to attack or discredit them.
As someone that does wander back and forth into the worlds of confidence and arrogance, its not because I'm deep down really insecure, weak or afraid.....instead its 3-fold at least for me. First and foremost, I very much DO enjoy playing the "psychological" game in any competitive arena. I like seeing the people's reactions when you tickle their egos a little bit, and I also like lighting a fire under someone's passion for the thrill of the competition. I am purposely trying to get them just a tad bit pissed at me to make them want to crush me more, because I truly do WANT their "A" game....I want them to give me absolutely every thing they got, because it will add to the spoils of victory even that much more.
The second part of it for me, is just upping the stakes a little bit more...actually giving MYSELF more pressure. Because now that I have talked so much shit before and during a competition, I damn well BETTER follow through and walk the walk after talking the talk....or else their will be a whole lot of egg on my face after. Not to mention knowing many of the other competitors (and spectators too) will have a lot of smug satisfaction if the cocky/arrogant guy didn't back what he was bringing.
Along with upping the stakes for yourself, it all adds further drama to the moment...and sometimes adds to the remembrance of the event years later. Think Babe Ruth pointing to center field just seconds before he put it over the fence in that very spot. Almost a 100 years later and people still remember and talk about what would have normally been "lost" in history's consciousness. That wasn't out of "weakness"...instead knowing how good he was and following through on it....and at this point that moment is now mythical rather than ordinary.
And being someone that is arrogant, I'll share one of my favorite times I/we followed through and it wasn't even in the sporting realm. About 15 years or so ago, we had a regional roundtable meeting of all the managers in our state to go over yearly initiatives and other bullshit with corporate and one of their vice presidents. A month before the meeting we were broken up into groups, and assigned the task of having to assess a specific business model that was failing....and come up with some problem solving ideas in a 15 minute presentation. We were a group of 4 each, and once I learned of 2 of the other managers that were on my team, I knew it was in the bag.
So we have a couple of conference calls in the weeks leading up to it, and the day of the meeting we learn there will be a cash prize to whoever gave the best ideas/presentation....and it would be determined by vote. All of the managers would be voting, along with our regional manager and the VP. So mostly had to impress/outdo the very people we were going against. But first we had to come up with a team name, and were given a few minutes to decide as a team.
While most of the other teams came up with "John's Juggernauts" or something else predictable....my ego couldn't help myself and came up with "Who's got second?" Implying we would win, and everyone else was fighting for second place. One of the managers on my team thatwas very capable but quite passive and conservative hated it, thinking it was too arrogant and abrasive...and nobody would vote for us because of it. The other 2 managers got a good chuckle, and we outvoted her so we went with it. Of course when we announced our team name there was a collective groan and eyeroll out of the room, but again it just raised the bar for us that much more.
We ended up nailing the presentation dead-on, were far more prepared and articulate than the rest....and when it came down to voting the tally wasn't even close. Out of 5 teams we got somewhere around 70-80% of the votes. Sometimes, when you are THAT DAMN GOOD, even people that have a stake in the claim and with bruised egos...they still can't overlook the obvious while swallowing their pride (and their own insecurities) and recognize true greatness when they see it.