You know, I think I'm going to break totse tradition and write a serious reply for you.
My brother has depression as well. Way back when, he used to have a girlfriend that was... Crazy. Also very needy.
Switching tracks here for a second, my parents also had an old house they had moved out of but still had most all of their stuff in it. Very old three story house with a basement and a garage. It had SO MUCH crap stuffed into both it and the garage and basement and they had to sort through it all and get rid of it or store it. My dad had to work so he couldn't go over there, leaving just me and my mom.
The first thing that went wrong was that we went during the winter time, and where the house was, winter's sucked. Incredibly cold... Icy... So there was the first problem. The second was that the house was in some small nothing town in the middle of nowhere. 30 miles to the nearest city where my brother lived. The third problem is that when we last left the house, we poured antifreeze down all the pipes because they had a tendency to crack in the winter time and flood the basement. So we didn't have any running water in the entire house. The only thing that was there was electricity.
For a little bit there, it was just us. Sitting in that godforsaken house in the middle of oblivion, sorting through and packing around an almost limitless supply of junk and old boxes in a crammed house with no water and little heat in the middle of winter. We had to rely on my mom's friend and truck stops in the city for showers. My dad was pressuring my mom to get done as soon as possible because it was draining him to support the electricity bill in that house alone what with the constant use of very energy consuming heaters that we had.
Then, one day, my brother had had it with his girlfriend completely and he had to go. He had to pack up what he could and leave. Leave his nice apartment, his two dogs, even a nice mostly brand new car they were just paying off. He had to leave all that and go. And of course, our decrepit house was the only place he could go now. He didn't even have his license as that was revoked because of an accident he had
As time wore on, the house seemed hardly closer to being finished than it had when we first got there. My mom was beginning to become strained to say the least and my brother was insanely depressed, having lost a huge massive chunk both physically and emotionally to his girlfriend. And now he was sitting with us in the middle of nowhere in the same situation we were in. But wait, there's more.
After my bro was with us for a little bit, my mother almost snapped in half one night. Almost went completely insane with stress to get the house done and also because of some existing mental problems she had which I won't go into right now. We had managed keep her on the level but it took a bit and we couldn't push her any further at all.
But we did get out. It took us about 5 months in total but we finally got it all done and we blew out of there. It seems like an age ago now. But my brother endured it all along with us. And I'm telling you, if he can, you can.
Thanks for the story, Arnox. Touching
Everyone is sad, I know. I'm nothing special, and you went through this rough 5 months period when both your brother and mother were a little unwell. So everyone can, right? Maybe. I dunno.
Think about your family or your friends. Anyone who cares about you. You commit suicide, you will tear them apart. They will never be the same again. So remember, if you can't hold on for yourself, you should hold on for the people who care about you.
I wish you hadn't said this piece. It's too true and I hate it. I've been affected by suicide in the past and I sort of know what it's like. Really don't want to do that to anyone else, especially not to my wonderful family that has always been there when I needed them. But I hurt. A lot. And I don't like it here. And I'm crazy, and unloved, and selfish. ugh
If I do commit suicide, I'll feel guilty about it. Maybe the only way to manage it is to forget about the people who love me.
How is your family now?
