I browse occaisionally but I can't tell what I've seen or whats new or whats going on

I can't tell if this place is a seeming metropolis of posts

or its dead

somebodeh tell meh 

and tonight I took my last drag of a cig 

I'm at the end of my rope here and i'm ready to get the fuck off benzos once and for all. Been taking 4mgs of it a day for as long as I can remember. really not a problem until recently since I've been put on probation and don't want to violate if I ever get drug tested. My first visit with my PO I told her I violated probation by tapering off "xanax" and she's like ok thats fine now that you're off the xanax. She didn't drug test me but you know they'll throw a DT in there some time during my year long probation. Probably next visit for her to see if I've really stopped the drug use.

Not only for my legal predicament but for my mental health as well. long term benzo use can lead to alzheimers I've read and thats just something i'd much rather avoid.

So what would be the best course of action here? Going to a doctor and trying to get a legit benzo subscription and then tapering off on my schedule using the ashton manual method of it? Always the chance of the Doctor not prescribing the benzo and giving some other shit like an antidepressant. Being straight up with a doctor and saying i'm addicted and I'd like to have some k-pins or something with a long half life to help me ween off? This would for sure put me on a list of drug users database or whatever and get prescribed Ibuprofen instead of opiates should I sustain some painful injury in the future. Rehab center seems a bit over kill, though probably what I need. This would in turn cost lots of money, cause lots of embarrassment amongst my family, and cause me to lose my job.

I really don't know what to do. Trying to get a legit script for anxiety seems the best option here unless I can use something like phenibut(of which i have 100gs) or other gabagenerics if there are any to replace benzos and not cause a positive benzo reault on a drug test that may or may not happen. My charge had nothing to do with drugs so I might not ever get drug tested but still I want to get off this shit and start the long process of mental recovery so I can be me old self again instead of benz'd out all day.

Help

-alex

This looks familiar

didn't I already tell yo bitch ass how to do it

Just get 20-50 of the pills or an amount you can measure if you still fucking with shit and go down as naturally and as needed as possible 3 a day 2 a day half if you need it whatever BREH

Cleaned out the kief catcher on my grinder this morning and smoked that shit, completely baked now

I'm mored bakeder than you, bitch nigga

*comes back later maybe*

ungah

this is where shit talkin gets me, a hassle of shit on a site I don't post on

I'd post my belleh if RisiR would show his "gains"

Didn't want to post so soon, but now on 25th pack.

I'd say my final pack but I'm not going to count my chickens before they be hatchin n shit 

The cold has changed my perspective

In other news, it being cold I haven't tested any impact on lungs, only punching bag and some lifting.

After this pack will do a legitimate workout and see if I notice anything, as a hypochondriac I should know if I'm my lungs are working worse than 25 packs ago.