A Fresh Start

[Arnox]

Some of you have noticed that I've been pretty distant lately. That I'm not willing to discuss anything. I freely admit it. I have been avoiding conversation for a while. This is due in part to the fact that I have found some of you here to be unreasonable. People that I've tried to talk to at some point or another in the past but have been unsuccessful. Some moreso than others. And with repeated staff harassment, this has caused me to retreat further from any public conversation. Especially about site and staff policy.

But having had time to think, I am willing to give this one more shot for us all. So, from here on out, everyone gets a fresh start in my eyes. Any perceptions I have had about any of you in the past are gone now and I am willing to talk and discuss things with everyone, no matter who they are. (Assuming they're not currently banned of course.)

However, there are some disclaimers here.

1. If anyone starts trying to flame or harass me again, I'm going to start ignoring them until they calm down. If you want to talk and actually have a dialogue with me, you have to be civil. I'm not going to waste my time with immaturity. This goes for everything too. So if someone bans you and I get an email along the lines of "OMG y u ban me fagit u suck", prepare for silence.

2. You must accept that I may not answer your question simply because there may be too many. My staff should also be able to answer any questions as well so please feel free to talk to them too. Also, we have a site FAQ in the News sub-forum so please also check that.

And that should be it.

TL;DR - I'm willing to talk now. Treat me with respect and I will treat you with respect.

[starvingniglet]

repeated staff harassment

Here is a question:  how is it 'harassment' when you guys have the power to ban whoever you want, and alter conversations however you want?  The power imbalance sort of precludes us doing much other than express our displeasure verbally.  That is 'harassment' to you?  'Harassment' is more like banning people for 'posting staff hate outside the staff hate thread', and banning people for posting stream-of-consciousness type posts in hb.

[Arnox]

Here is a question:  how is it 'harassment' when you guys have the power to ban whoever you want, and alter conversations however you want?  The power imbalance sort of precludes us doing much other than express our displeasure verbally.  That is 'harassment' to you?  'Harassment' is more like banning people for 'posting staff hate outside the staff hate thread', and banning people for posting stream-of-consciousness type posts in hb.

There are many different kinds of harassment. I was talking about the constant unwarranted flaming mostly. Badgering the staff with a bunch of questions as well. Some of them rather silly... Now obviously some forms of harassment are indeed greater than others... (Oh, and BTW, that thread is about to be decommissioned now with the new rules most likely.) But whether it was truly harassment to restrict staff complaints to one thread is up for debate in my eyes.

I guess I'm kind of confused what you're trying to say. Are you asking how we can feel harassed when you guys have been supposedly more harassed? Well, I would argue that you guys weren't being abused at all and that I made sure everything was fair but it would take ages to go through every single staff decision. Perhaps you could narrow it down to one or two if you really feel like discussing that.

[starvingniglet]

I guess I'm kind of confused what you're trying to say. Are you asking how we can feel harassed when you guys have been supposedly more harassed? Well, I would argue that you guys weren't being abused at all and that I made sure everything was fair but it would take ages to go through every single staff decision. Perhaps you could narrow it down to one or two if you really feel like discussing that.

all I really care about is the banning people for dumb reasons thing.  Once that is addressed, I will shut up, I promise.  Until then, I am just about going to work any angle I can to try and get my agenda through.

I was going to pick apart the OP and go through your numbered list and explain how each one could be used to avoid any debate once you felt things get out of your control, but I am sure you get the idea without me actually doing so.

[equanimity]

I guess I'm kind of confused what you're trying to say. Are you asking how we can feel harassed when you guys have been supposedly more harassed? Well, I would argue that you guys weren't being abused at all and that I made sure everything was fair but it would take ages to go through every single staff decision. Perhaps you could narrow it down to one or two if you really feel like discussing that.

all I really care about is the banning people for dumb reasons thing.  Once that is addressed, I will shut up, I promise.  Until then, I am just about going to work any angle I can to try and get my agenda through.

I was going to pick apart the OP and go through your numbered list and explain how each one could be used to avoid any debate once you felt things get out of your control, but I am sure you get the idea without me actually doing so.

I was speaking to both Bling Bling and Ninja in PMs as they were in the process of getting themselves banned.  Asked them really politely to please stop breaking the rules.  In Bling's case, he spammed SG (the "serious" general forum) one too many times, and later on ban evaded to do it some more.  Really tried reaching out to him but he was just like: "wut".

lol.

Ninja was upset about staff complaints being put into the one big thread.  I told him if he had complaints he could make them more productively, and maybe even work with us all to find a better solution in time.  He told me that he wanted to be banned and that we're all stupid.  Wish he'd have stuck around and sought out those agreeable solutions with us, but he's free to do what he will with his time

[Arnox]

I guess I'm kind of confused what you're trying to say. Are you asking how we can feel harassed when you guys have been supposedly more harassed? Well, I would argue that you guys weren't being abused at all and that I made sure everything was fair but it would take ages to go through every single staff decision. Perhaps you could narrow it down to one or two if you really feel like discussing that.

all I really care about is the banning people for dumb reasons thing.  Once that is addressed, I will shut up, I promise.  Until then, I am just about going to work any angle I can to try and get my agenda through.

I was going to pick apart the OP and go through your numbered list and explain how each one could be used to avoid any debate once you felt things get out of your control, but I am sure you get the idea without me actually doing so.

Well, I can't take care of what you're asking of me or even do much explaining of the supposed dumb reasons if you don't give me an example of some sort I'm afraid.

As to the points, I actually kinda agree that the second point is a little questionable indeed but I'm just a single person and not a robot. If 10 people come to me with complex questions, you guys just have to understand that I can't answer everything all the time. If you really feel the question is important, you can PM me it as well. If I don't respond, it's a very good indicator that I'm ignoring you and you will have to calm down before I answer you once more.

You guys also need to understand that, believe it or not, I'm just like you. I don't like sitting off in a corner like some loser at a party. I want to actually, you know, enjoy the forum that I created. I'm not here to be the next Hitler, no matter how much you may see me like that. That's all I'm gonna say. It's up to you all, of course, in terms of what you want to think.

[Flowerz]

lol. Called it.


http://www.intosanctuary.com/index.php?topic=2388.50

I just wonder if this is a sign that arnox is just fed up in general.

Constant attacks, members unable to follow simple rules, discussion of the same past topics over and over and OVER again, people insulting SpectraL/DaGuru/TDR for the 50,000th time, talking about how this site's going to fail, and freaking child porn of all things getting spammed all over the site by sick pedophiles... Yeah, you could say I'm just a little fed up.

You know, my family members and my friends wonder why I put so much effort into this site when I talk to them about it. They tell me that I'm wasting my time. That I should just shut it down. That it's a stupid drain on my time and resources...

But I'm not going to give up on you guys just like that. I didn't invest my own time and money into this just to drop it down the toilet. I will keep this site up and will do so for at least a long time. And I'm not going to start censoring the userbase unfairly. But you guys do need to understand something. This is all really beginning to grow tiresome for me. When I log in to see a bunch of the recent topics getting filled with drama threads and none of the worthy threads getting any activity at all, I see a problem. And this has been going on for a long time.

I just don't understand it... We never had this problem at totse2. Even when totse had first shut down, when everyone was devastated by its loss, we STILL did not do nearly the amount of complaining that has been going on lately. We were cool about it. We moved on and we had an awesome time with what we had. But I guess that's irrelevant now.

Maybe it's just me. Maybe I messed up somewhere. Maybe I messed up in a lot of places. I don't know. All I know is, this site is beginning to become less like how I envisioned it and more like a place I have to go to maintain and clean up every day. I try to enjoy it but it's not really there. It's piled under all the BS.

If I could get you all to understand anything, it would be to understand where I'm coming from here. Even in my everyday life, things aren't going so hot right now. So please. I'm trying to help you all as best as I can while keeping the interests of the site in mind. Please stop making my job harder than it already is.

Its you, and the userbase. You aren't at fault at all, but your expectations certainly are.

My advice: You've been doing a good job so far (despite being mormon and loving dragons). A better job than zok anyways.

Don't set your expectations too high, and don't put in too much effort. Don't burn yourself out. I feel like that's what zok did. He went all in, and then quit. Be here, but don't be obsessed with this website. Maintain your sanity and personal life above all else. This thread in itself is proof enough of that. Trying to mod every thread in the forum for drama is suicide. I get that you want quality posts, but you can not, and will not, be able to enforce that. Its something that had to evolve on its own. Yes, some moderation is needed, but if you try to babysit the entire website, you are going to have a bad time, and just rage quit or go into exile like zok did. Don't make that mistake. Chill out.

My two cents anyways.

[Arnox]

lol. Called it.

Heh. And so you did...

[theKit]

Some of you have noticed that I've been pretty distant lately. That I'm not willing to discuss anything. I freely admit it. I have been avoiding conversation for a while. This is due in part to the fact that I have found some of you here to be unreasonable. People that I've tried to talk to at some point or another in the past but have been unsuccessful. Some moreso than others. And with repeated staff harassment, this has caused me to retreat further from any public conversation. Especially about site and staff policy.

But having had time to think, I am willing to give this one more shot for us all. So, from here on out, everyone gets a fresh start in my eyes. Any perceptions I have had about any of you in the past are gone now and I am willing to talk and discuss things with everyone, no matter who they are. (Assuming they're not currently banned of course.)

However, there are some disclaimers here.

1. If anyone starts trying to flame or harass me again, I'm going to start ignoring them until they calm down. If you want to talk and actually have a dialogue with me, you have to be civil. I'm not going to waste my time with immaturity. This goes for everything too. So if someone bans you and I get an email along the lines of "OMG y u ban me fagit u suck", prepare for silence.

2. You must accept that I may not answer your question simply because there may be too many. My staff should also be able to answer any questions as well so please feel free to talk to them too. Also, we have a site FAQ in the News sub-forum so please also check that.

And that should be it.

TL;DR - I'm willing to talk now. Treat me with respect and I will treat you with respect.

How old are you? This thread seems absolutely ridiculous, why on earth do you find it necessary as the site admin to justify ignoring/punishing idiots who refuse to follow the rules?  I'm not trying to bust your balls here but no one gives a fuck how they're seen by you. No one cares if you don't participate in conversation, as long as you're administrating - no - one - gives - a - fuck. You really shouldn't be posting under your admin account for anything other than 'taking care of business' anyway. It's really sad that you and your admins can't seem to manage the few retards who're trying to ruin the place. If someones not following the rules, GET RID OF THEM. Why are you begging for respect from trash? You guys need to get your shit together.

[starvingniglet]

this is the third time I have tried to post this, site keeps timing out for me.

Well, I can't take care of what you're asking of me or even do much explaining of the supposed dumb reasons if you don't give me an example of some sort I'm afraid

I asked in another thread for amnesty for bling and ninja, and for a moratorium on banning people for posting 'contentless' posts, in HB at least.

But since you stalled another day or two until you were ready to parley, the bans are over, or will be soon...I haven't seen ninja posting since his ban was lifted...he probably left, and I don't blame him.

Infinityshock, who was banned for 'posting the same things in every thread' has had some guy following him around posting the same thing to him in every thread.  Ironic, yes....hilarious...yes......A stupid reason to ban someone....also yes....

There are many others who were banned for stupid reasons, these are just a few examples. 

[theKit]

this is the third time I have tried to post this, site keeps timing out for me.



Infinityshock, who was banned for 'posting the same things in every thread' has had some guy following him around posting the same thing to him in every thread.  Ironic, yes....hilarious...yes......A stupid reason to ban someone....also yes....

There are many others who were banned for stupid reasons, these are just a few examples. 

1) thats called spam 2) it is not ironic that a two spammers were banned 3) it is not stupid to ban retards who can't follow simple rules.

Seriously how many times has Infinity been banned? There should be no 'amnesty' for him. He should not be allowed back here at all. As long as you're following the rules and you're not getting banned, you need to shut the fuck up. This isn't your site and the administration can run it how they please. If you keep bitching because things aren't run like you want, you should leave.

[starvingniglet]

If you keep bitching because things aren't run like you want, you should leave.

Or, alternately, you could suck my cock....

[Arnox]

this is the third time I have tried to post this, site keeps timing out for me.

Well, I can't take care of what you're asking of me or even do much explaining of the supposed dumb reasons if you don't give me an example of some sort I'm afraid

I asked in another thread for amnesty for bling and ninja, and for a moratorium on banning people for posting 'contentless' posts, in HB at least.

But since you stalled another day or two until you were ready to parley, the bans are over, or will be soon...I haven't seen ninja posting since his ban was lifted...he probably left, and I don't blame him.

Infinityshock, who was banned for 'posting the same things in every thread' has had some guy following him around posting the same thing to him in every thread.  Ironic, yes....hilarious...yes......A stupid reason to ban someone....also yes....

There are many others who were banned for stupid reasons, these are just a few examples. 

Are you logged in for a set time?

As to the amnesty and a moratorium... Well, as you've seen, I didn't check those threads and if I did, I was ignoring such things because of the reasons stated in the OP. But it doesn't really matter anymore. The rules are going to be rewritten.

And IS, I don't know who's been following him for the same reasons.

[Spectre]

I'm sorry but this is about the 3rd time you've claimed a start over on discussions and every time with that you ask for everyone to restate the reasons they are upset and act ignorant to the complaints in the first place this is what leads to users being "flippant" with you

[-SpectraL]

... It's really sad that you and your admins can't seem to manage the few retards who're trying to ruin the place. If someones not following the rules, GET RID OF THEM. ...

Errr... who are teh reatrds??