Author Topic: Has anyone read the bible?  (Read 5918 times)

0 Members and 3 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #15 on: October 06, 2014, 04:26:45 pm »
i confirmed everything i read in the bible on wikipedia
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline Slave of the Beast

  • Arch Disciple
  • ***
  • Posts: 789
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #16 on: October 06, 2014, 04:38:58 pm »
Currently going through it. I highly recommend the standard King James version. The Bible is already incredibly full of holes so preferably, you want to get the version that's closest to the source material while still being readable for you. The King James version fits that.

The source materials used in modern translations are no less valid. The differences between KJV and most modern English translations are minor. To state otherwise is fundamentally an appeal to antiquity. In fact with modern translations the advantage is not having to try and understand an ancient text translated into archaic English, which contains words whose primary meaning have changed over the centuries.

Offline Obbe

  • Disciple
  • ***
  • Posts: 376
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #17 on: October 06, 2014, 04:41:13 pm »
Currently going through it. I highly recommend the standard King James version. The Bible is already incredibly full of holes so preferably, you want to get the version that's closest to the source material while still being readable for you. The King James version fits that.

The source materials used in modern translations are no less valid. The differences between KJV and most modern English translations are minor. To state otherwise is fundamentally an appeal to antiquity. In fact with modern translations the advantage is not having to try and understand an ancient text translated into archaic English, which contains words whose primary meaning have changed over the centuries.

This, arnox.
All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies.
&T

Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #18 on: October 06, 2014, 04:53:11 pm »
There are differences in translations, and whole phrases that are shortened into words with more 'concise' meanings.  Look for yourself, do a search like 'KJV compared to NIV' for example.  Don't just listen to random posters who use pat little phrases like 'appeal to antiquity' to put anyone who prefers the older versions into a nice little label to dismiss any and all of their opinions.
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline Slave of the Beast

  • Arch Disciple
  • ***
  • Posts: 789
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #19 on: October 06, 2014, 05:11:41 pm »
There are differences in translations, and whole phrases that are shortened into words with more 'concise' meanings.  Look for yourself, do a search like 'KJV compared to NIV' for example.  Don't just listen to random posters who use pat little phrases like 'appeal to antiquity' to put anyone who prefers the older versions into a nice little label to dismiss any and all of their opinions.

What is it with American protestants christians and Bible Envy? I'm not interested in nit-picking sectarian bullshit derived from someone dropping the 'thee's, thou's and comeths'. Has the fundamental message of Christ been changed by those conniving Papist publishers? No.


Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #20 on: October 06, 2014, 05:13:31 pm »
Has the fundamental message of Christ been changed by those conniving Papist publishers? No.

Thanks for correcting me.  I guess I am wrong just because you say so,  You being the worlds sole authority on the accuracy of bible translation and all.
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline Slave of the Beast

  • Arch Disciple
  • ***
  • Posts: 789
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #21 on: October 06, 2014, 05:25:23 pm »
Has the fundamental message of Christ been changed by those conniving Papist publishers? No.

Thanks for correcting me.  I guess I am wrong just because you say so,  You being the worlds sole authority on the accuracy of bible translation and all.

So the fundamental message(s) of Christ have changed? To what exactly?

Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #22 on: October 06, 2014, 05:27:58 pm »
So the fundamental message(s) of Christ have changed? To what exactly?

I posted 'look for yourself' to the OP so I wouldn't have to split hairs about it in a forum thread.  So, let the OP look for himself.  It is easy to find online versions of both and compare the two.
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline theKit

  • Devotee
  • **
  • Posts: 178
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #23 on: October 06, 2014, 06:04:19 pm »
OP just go with New King James Version, it drops a lot of the archaic shit while still not being outlandishly washed out as the NIV.

Whoever said the OT is just a bunch of names and whatnot hasn't read the whole damn thing. It's interesting as fuck. Once you get out of Leviticus and into the juicy Joshua and Judges, there is a shit ton of murder and rape and God smiting heathens. If you read the stories for what they are, it's interesting as fuck. Johna is my favorite. Dude spends God knows how long trying to literally run away from God then ends up sits down outside a city waiting and HOPING God will drop fireballs on people.  Hes the old school snitch everyone hates in prison.

Offline Soso0

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,324
  • BOOM
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #24 on: October 06, 2014, 09:43:57 pm »
Currently going through it. I highly recommend the standard King James version. The Bible is already incredibly full of holes so preferably, you want to get the version that's closest to the source material while still being readable for you. The King James version fits that.
The King James Version it is.
OP just go with New King James Version, it drops a lot of the archaic shit while still not being outlandishly washed out as the NIV.

Whoever said the OT is just a bunch of names and whatnot hasn't read the whole damn thing. It's interesting as fuck. Once you get out of Leviticus and into the juicy Joshua and Judges, there is a shit ton of murder and rape and God smiting heathens. If you read the stories for what they are, it's interesting as fuck. Johna is my favorite. Dude spends God knows how long trying to literally run away from God then ends up sits down outside a city waiting and HOPING God will drop fireballs on people.  Hes the old school snitch everyone hates in prison.
I just want to be more informed about what's in the bible and learn about the stories in it. I plan on reading it as if it is a novel.

Offline Arnox

  • Administrator
  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,053
  • Relax, my friend.
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #25 on: October 06, 2014, 09:59:34 pm »
There are differences in translations, and whole phrases that are shortened into words with more 'concise' meanings.  Look for yourself, do a search like 'KJV compared to NIV' for example.

Mostly this. Also, I don't pretend to know what all the differences are between one translation and another. I do know though that with just one simple tiny word, you can change the meaning of a sentence to be the exact opposite of what it was as well. So when you say minor differences... Yeah.


Time is always against you in some way or another.

email: fakeout0@yahoo.com

Offline Michael Myers

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,093
  • Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #26 on: October 06, 2014, 10:12:01 pm »
Just parts of it. Also, there's a lot of stuff about sex so you might get a hard-on if you can fantasize.

Offline theKit

  • Devotee
  • **
  • Posts: 178
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #27 on: October 06, 2014, 10:29:50 pm »
Usually things are clear from context so even if they use different words to express things - you'll get the original intent. People the Bible is one of the most scrutinized texts in existence. If you're SO concerned about it you could read all the different versions of a particular passage on biblegateway or something.

The Biblical texts are a collection of letters. Don't expect to get a coherent start to finish story by reading start to end. If you do read it like that take each section for what is contained in it. If you're going to read it might as well take the valuable lessons from it as well.

Also enjoy it because really, it is full of history of places people and events we know for a fact existed. Wilder spiritual claims are up to you to believe or not but if you read it as if everything is true even if you don't believe it, makes the whole thing much more exciting.  One part in Judges, the people of Israel are all like "woooo sexy immorality do what we wanttttttttt wooo party" then God is like "smite" then they're all like "sufffferrrrrrrrringgggg" and God is like "... little help" -> cycle repeats 4 or 5 times and then once you expect it to start over, one day the people are all like "oh noess sufferringnnng hallp" and God just says "...No". God is so Boss :)

Offline dragqueen slayer

  • Adherent
  • *
  • !
  • Posts: 95
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #28 on: October 06, 2014, 10:52:58 pm »
I'm probably the only person here who's smoked weed/cigs off bible paper

Never read the book though, I know how it ends

^Mizled post

Offline -SpectraL

  • Commandant
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,605
  • Sinking kidiots since 1989
    • View Profile
Re: Has anyone read the bible?
« Reply #29 on: October 06, 2014, 11:30:55 pm »

Read it all through several times in several versions. The New World Translation is the most accurate. In the King James version, the word YHWH from the original manuscripts has been removed and been replaced with "Lord" and "God" (except for three places, Psalms 83:18 one of the remaining three), and many, many words have been intentionally translated incorrectly to suit the political correctness of the day. The original ancient manuscripts contained thousands of references to the real name of God, which is YHWH (JHVH in English), but only the New World Translation preserved them.