Author Topic: Can I make a comprehensive list of things of the cringiest things I've ever said  (Read 2084 times)

0 Members and 3 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
It'll take some time. I think one day I'm going to take all the autistic things i've said that i hardly remember, mainly around when i got kicked out of 9th grade to a suspension school. it was solely on the basis of what i've written, and my lawyer was like "if we got the other judge in the roomy uou'd be in prison right now?

if i just sold this as a compilation i think it might be the outrageously offensive thing anyone has ever read
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
"It's only when I read shit like this that I favor a fascist government that practices eugenics."
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
I would buy the fuck out of something like this.  Make it fucking good though, sploo
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline Michael Myers

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,093
  • Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs
    • View Profile
I like sploo.

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
I would buy the fuck out of something like this.  Make it fucking good though, sploo

I think I'm seriously going to do this at some point. Under a psuedonym ofcourse. And I can use some of the fucktarded zoklet posts as dialogue from other characters, paraphrased a bit, so it looks like an actual discussion and just one page that's painful to read through to the next

i will call it the chromosomeology of failures
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
epic thread where i throw a huge hissy fit about acting like an idiot and my gf dumping me

http://zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=301213
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
I think I'm seriously going to do this at some point. Under a psuedonym ofcourse. And I can use some of the fucktarded zoklet posts as dialogue from other characters, paraphrased a bit, so it looks like an actual discussion and just one page that's painful to read through to the next

i will call it the chromosomeology of failures

Make it have those pages in little kids books that are like plastic, so that bodily fluids and booze won't ruin the book. 
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline Michael Myers

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,093
  • Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs
    • View Profile
I think I'm seriously going to do this at some point. Under a psuedonym ofcourse. And I can use some of the fucktarded zoklet posts as dialogue from other characters, paraphrased a bit, so it looks like an actual discussion and just one page that's painful to read through to the next

i will call it the chromosomeology of failures

Make it have those pages in little kids books that are like plastic, so that bodily fluids and booze won't ruin the book.

You mean the 3D stuff?

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
I think I'm seriously going to do this at some point. Under a psuedonym ofcourse. And I can use some of the fucktarded zoklet posts as dialogue from other characters, paraphrased a bit, so it looks like an actual discussion and just one page that's painful to read through to the next

i will call it the chromosomeology of failures

Make it have those pages in little kids books that are like plastic, so that bodily fluids and booze won't ruin the book.

You mean the 3D stuff?

no he means laminated. but when you open one of the pages a bunch of 3-d paper dicks stick out in all directions, usually hitting the reader.

this is to commemorate the DICKS EVERYWHERE legacy
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline Michael Myers

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,093
  • Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs
    • View Profile
I think I'm seriously going to do this at some point. Under a psuedonym ofcourse. And I can use some of the fucktarded zoklet posts as dialogue from other characters, paraphrased a bit, so it looks like an actual discussion and just one page that's painful to read through to the next

i will call it the chromosomeology of failures

Make it have those pages in little kids books that are like plastic, so that bodily fluids and booze won't ruin the book.

You mean the 3D stuff?

no he means laminated. but when you open one of the pages a bunch of 3-d paper dicks stick out in all directions, usually hitting the reader.

this is to commemorate the DICKS EVERYWHERE legacy

I would so buy this book. And give it to my friends on their birthdays, where we sit in a circle (including their families) and I let them unpack it. We all go "read it to us!" and they open it up and *BOOM* DICKS EVERYWHERE. Family is in shock. I die of laughter.


Offline millionsofdeadcats

  • Veteran
  • *****
  • Posts: 2,110
  • fuck you michael myers
    • View Profile
no he means laminated. but when you open one of the pages a bunch of 3-d paper dicks stick out in all directions, usually hitting the reader.

this is to commemorate the DICKS EVERYWHERE legacy

If I buy this, and I open the pages, and a bunch of 3-d paper dicks come flying out, I will find you and kick your fucking ass.
quote author=dragqueen slayer link=topic=1184.msg35656#msg35656 date=1412632872]Cory is fucking retarded[/quote

Offline splooge gook

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,468
  • The Hysteric Child
    • View Profile
to make it semi-educational a real life activity can be given and explained at the end of each relevant chapters

like a few pahes after the popping out dick there could be a DIY on how to make origami phallic symbols

or you could keep the reader on his or her toes the entire times if you made pop up dicks hit you in the face every few times. this doesn't start happening until about halfway through the book, but then you get sprayed with raid ejaculate every 2-6 pages until you ragequit and throw the book on the ground. once enough people have thrown their books on the ground, it would become a public icon (like OBEY) and everyone would become interested in it
Everything I post iz fiction

"I've shot meth before, is it water soluble?" -semiazas
"I fapped so much and talked to Semiazas. I was addicted from that point forward." - DARE

https://www.zoklet.net/bbs/showthread.php?t=276946 (use internet wayback)

Offline Lord hang man

  • Adherent
  • *
  • Posts: 78
    • View Profile
Sploogy u r an odd duck

Offline unbreakable matter

  • Zealot
  • ****
  • !
  • Posts: 1,108
    • View Profile
Was the god=aliens before or after I made an offhand comment about the possibility of the pyramids being built by aliens and obbe bugged me vua PM for a month telling me to make a thread about it so I made a thread about how aliens building pyramids is  scientifically sound and has been corroborated by science and aliens are god except pedophiles and I posted the thread and nothing really happened, FON kinda got BTFO then I made obbe mad in peoo so he bumped it and a collective of victims and faggots emerged, taking the ridiculous thread literally but only managing to latch onto the possibility that I did not know how to cite academic sources properly before enrolling in post secondary education HAHA BURN IM TTLY NOT BUTTHURT ancient aliens/10 excellent self promotion and disxussion what the fuck is everyones IQ?

But I liked your threads with internet msgs with that girl, it was a weird window into a teenage world and made me realize how trchnology is going to alienate millenials and future generations at an exponential rate. "The generation that went outside" wont happen until the aliens come back for their pyramids and leave the worldbin ruins.

But my favorite part is that you shaped her perception of a relationship and how she views "boyz" as she gets older.

"Ok hunny the guy who took my virginity used to send me manic txt msgs about god=aliens while smoking fake weedand huffing starter fluid, every msg we sent back to each other had quotations everywhere because our personalities werent fully formed and self referentially derrivative and we're ok with that because we're millenials and we understand each other"

"Whore"

You did good sploo dont ever become less like yourself
dont ever become less like yourself
dony ever become leas like yourself

What are your fav UM quotes? I honestly forget all but my most throwaway threads. The only ones that come to mind is a heatbag thread I wisjed I never made and a thread about how sexy the new leader of HAMAS is
God Bless