The Sanctuary

Carnality => Sex & Affection => Topic started by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:03:02 pm

Title: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:03:02 pm
She clearly wants it, basically saying as much. Problem is she's all "yung n driiiiikkkiinnnn tymmme :-) (or some similar smiley I don't know how to make cuz I'm not 14 anymore) which is cool but I literally haven't been drunk in 2 years and have been known to get violent, it's actually kinda worrisome sometimes, I am especially worried because of stuff and stuff.

So, me chilling on muh whiskey gettin my grown man on (she knows how old I am and was very surprised, and decided to go on about how people think she's older even though she clearly looks like a fresh faced toddler) and dem girls are "woooooohhhh" it's gonna be gay.

What actually do?

This is a troll thread btw, maybe, I haven't decided yet.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Obbe on November 07, 2014, 10:09:59 pm
She clearly wants it, basically saying as much. Problem is she's all "yung n driiiiikkkiinnnn tymmme :-) (or some similar smiley I don't know how to make cuz I'm not 14 anymore) which is cool but I literally haven't been drunk in 2 years and have been known to get violent, it's actually kinda worrisome sometimes, I am especially worried because of stuff and stuff.

So, me chilling on muh whiskey gettin my grown man on (she knows how old I am and was very surprised, and decided to go on about how people think she's older even though she clearly looks like a fresh faced toddler) and dem girls are "woooooohhhh" it's gonna be gay.

What actually do?

This is a troll thread btw, maybe, I haven't decided yet.

Have a drink or two, slowly,  get your dick sucked, leave.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:14:00 pm
nah, they wanna like, go clubbin type shit SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS etc. which has resulted in me throwing glasses down onto dance floors before because I thought I saw someone I didn't like.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 07, 2014, 10:16:52 pm
Work out your anger issue and then go drinking?
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:19:29 pm
Work out your anger issue and then go drinking?

No can do, I'm of lower class scottish/german ancestry
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 07, 2014, 10:24:05 pm
Get friends where drinking isn't a prerequisite to maintaining the relationship?
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 07, 2014, 10:24:47 pm
I'm of lower class scottish/german ancestry
Quote
I literally haven't been drunk in 2 years

You're doing it wrong.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:27:30 pm
Get friends where drinking isn't a prerequisite to maintaining the relationship?

Yeah but how else am I gonna fuck girls 7 years younger than me that aren't drug addicts?

I'm of lower class scottish/german ancestry
Quote
I literally haven't been drunk in 2 years

You're doing it wrong.

Or I'm just self aware
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:32:15 pm
Is there like some magic herb you take that doesn't get you drunk and makes your dick rock hard or somethin?

Fuck, I think I just figured it out, it's called taking stimulants but I feel I need a "test run" beforehand
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 07, 2014, 10:38:06 pm
Or you're fuck yourself.

I don't drink myself so it's all cool, my man. Sieg Heil.


Tell them that you can't drink too much because it makes you violent. It will show them that you are a self conscious gentleman who knows his limits but learned them the hard way like a true OG. Then you get real shitfaced until you can't even get a hard on anymore and start a fight with a guy who asks the fat chick for E's. That will impress the toddler face and she will totally think of you again when she watches Lock Up: Raw.

:tup:
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:48:32 pm
Or you're fuck yourself.

I don't drink myself so it's all cool, my man. Sieg Heil.


Tell them that you can't drink too much because it makes you violent. It will show them that you are a self conscious gentleman who knows his limits but learned them the hard way like a true OG. Then you get real shitfaced until you can't even get a hard on anymore and start a fight with a guy who asks the fat chick for E's. That will impress the toddler face and she will totally think of you again when she watches Lock Up: Raw.

:tup:

Cool, that's actually a pretty good plan, I told her I've been working far away for years instead of nefarious things. I think I'm gonna say I'll come out for a few drinks and just sip my whiskey and order shots of goose like a balla and watch them get drunk then when she eventually starts hanging off me because she's all weak from the sauce, I get all up on her and shit.

 I didn't even mention that the gurl just broke up with her boyfriend or possibly girlfriend and made a joke about how much she likes big dicks and her fat friend was like "___omg" and she was like "sorry, just had it on my mind, lol"

yeah, she's a sweet girl but young and shit and her fat friend seems to kinda look out for her a bit but she likes me too and is older and knows how old I am and I don't wanna have a 3some with her fat friend because she's fat, lol I hope she ain't liek dat even though all girls are and I can prove it empirically.

This thread is a troll, no one even respond to me
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 07, 2014, 10:52:49 pm
Report back how it worked.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 07, 2014, 10:57:37 pm
it probly won't be until next week though
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 07, 2014, 10:59:47 pm
That's ok.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: joe camel on November 07, 2014, 11:53:45 pm
You are clearly retarded if you cant figure out how to bang the non fat chick
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: DOOM on November 07, 2014, 11:59:05 pm
Drug them both, if that fails fuck the fat one
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: fanglekai on November 08, 2014, 12:00:13 am
1. go out with them to a bar
2. get them drunk
3. throw a burrito
4. tell teh fat girl to run and get it
5. run off with the skinny girl
6. ??????
7. profit
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:11:23 am
btw fucking a homo of any gender makes you a homo too fyi
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 08, 2014, 12:19:25 am
a homo of any gender
Don't fag this shit up, bro.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:20:59 am
dyke == fag, it was faggy to start with braj
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:21:25 am
p.s. im drunk
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:29:49 am
p.s. im drunk

how? describe what its like to me
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:32:22 am
so i was at the store and there was apple cider and like a few feet away there was this spiced rum and I was like "fuck, that'd go well together" thats probably what the owner thought too when they put them there so i bought them but i have this thing where for me mixed drinks are like "alcohol with something mixed in but mostly alcohol" so ive had a lot of spiced rum and a little cider and it was good but maybe i should have put more cider in also its good
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 08, 2014, 12:33:06 am
You're a dyke? What are you trying to tell me, brate?

P.S. I'm high.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: starvingniglet on November 08, 2014, 12:34:07 am
btw fucking a homo of any gender makes you a homo too fyi

I don't think that is how it works.  Fucking some bitch while another one licks all over her clit does not make you a 'homo',  if anything it makes you ultra-hetero

ps manna, don't fuck the fat one
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:34:57 am
I just cooked a jolly rancher in a spoon and injected into my foot
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:39:11 am
maybe i missed the point of OP, is he trying to get with the bisexual chick or the fat friend? if it's the bi chick then i was trying to point out that bi(homo) is an associative relationship so like if you have 1 + 2 + 3 that's the same as (1 + 2) + 3 is the same as 1 + (2 + 3) so like:

Code: [Select]
male + (female + female)
       ^homo
=
(male + female) + female
        ^still homo
=
OP is a fag

Q.E.D

formal proof im fucking andrew wilkes and shit fermat spread ur ass
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: equanimity on November 08, 2014, 12:39:28 am
btw fucking a homo of any gender makes you a homo too fyi

I don't think that is how it works.  Fucking some bitch while another one licks all over her clit does not make you a 'homo',  if anything it makes you ultra-hetero

ps manna, don't fuck the fat one

If that's not how it works, then how do you explain all the gay people you see everywhere?  Do they fall from the sky, or grow on trees? :roll:
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:40:53 am
btw fucking a homo of any gender makes you a homo too fyi

I don't think that is how it works.  Fucking some bitch while another one licks all over her clit does not make you a 'homo',  if anything it makes you ultra-hetero

ps manna, don't fuck the fat one

If that's not how it works, then how do you explain all the gay people you see everywhere?  Do they fall from the sky, or grow on trees? :roll:

Don't fucking derail this thread you sickeningly dry piece of shit
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:41:26 am
btw fucking a homo of any gender makes you a homo too fyi

I don't think that is how it works.  Fucking some bitch while another one licks all over her clit does not make you a 'homo',  if anything it makes you ultra-hetero

ps manna, don't fuck the fat one

If that's not how it works, then how do you explain all the gay people you see everywhere?  Do they fall from the sky, or grow on trees? :roll:

^^yesh, it's like this dominant recessive thing where being gay is the dominant trait. There's like peas and squares and all kinds of shit to demonstrate how this works. Basically in 100 generations everyone is going to be gay and it's going to be absolutely wonderful just watch out.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:44:55 am
maybe i missed the point of OP, is he trying to get with the bisexual chick or the fat friend? if it's the bi chick then i was trying to point out that bi(homo) is an associative relationship so like if you have 1 + 2 + 3 that's the same as (1 + 2) + 3 is the same as 1 + (2 + 3) so like:

Code: [Select]
male + (female + female)
       ^homo
=
(male + female) + female
        ^still homo
=
OP is a fag

Q.E.D

formal proof im fucking andrew wilkes and shit fermat spread ur ass

lol, I get what you're saying but the girl is bi (homo) and I think her fat friend is skr8. Pretty sure it was a girl she broke up with which is good since I recall in high school that girls who claimed bi would fuck girls after breaking up with guys, lol.

 I am optimistic. I haven't really lied to her yet about anything and don't want to.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: starvingniglet on November 08, 2014, 12:45:23 am
If that's not how it works, then how do you explain all the gay people you see everywhere?  Do they fall from the sky, or grow on trees? :roll:

are you seriously saying that gay people are generated by people having sex with partners who have had sex with members of the same sex?
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 08, 2014, 12:46:17 am
Don't fag this shit up, bro.
It happened. Shit got fagged up.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: starvingniglet on November 08, 2014, 12:47:29 am
generations

gay

 :facepalm:
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 12:48:12 am
FEEL THE FAGINESS IN THE AIR. BREATHE IN DEEP. LIVE THAT FAG LYFE YOU FUCKING HETEROS
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:49:28 am
Lanny is literally Michael Stipe
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: equanimity on November 08, 2014, 12:51:01 am
are you seriously saying that gay people are generated by people having sex with partners who have had sex with members of the same sex?

Homosexuality is a sexually transmitted disease that started when men in Africa had same-sex relations with apes.  It's science.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: starvingniglet on November 08, 2014, 12:53:52 am
Homosexuality is a sexually transmitted disease that started when men in Africa had same-sex relations with apes.  It's science.

So there was no homosexuality, right?  and these guys went and fucked male apes, in a world without homosexuality, and that created homosexuality?  Is that what you are saying?

Between that and Lanny saying that gays are going to have 'generations'....this thread is fucking wierd
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: equanimity on November 08, 2014, 12:55:01 am
They were probably high on PCP.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 08, 2014, 12:56:43 am
thanks for derailing this thread with faggotry, equalopportunityretardation
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: equanimity on November 08, 2014, 01:00:00 am
thanks for derailing this thread with faggotry, equalopportunityretardation

Update us when you get some action.  I promise the other posters will be interested to hear about that once it happens.

Until then, cool your jets.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 08, 2014, 01:03:54 am
I'm literally Stipe Miocic vs Roy Nelson round 3 right now.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: Lanny on November 08, 2014, 01:06:07 am
Homosexuality is a sexually transmitted disease that started when men in Africa had same-sex relations with apes.  It's science.

So there was no homosexuality, right?  and these guys went and fucked male apes, in a world without homosexuality, and that created homosexuality?  Is that what you are saying?

Between that and Lanny saying that gays are going to have 'generations'....this thread is fucking wierd

(http://i.imgur.com/cgx6EbE.png)

Nice digits braj
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: manna on November 12, 2014, 09:02:27 pm
meeting up with her and fatty on friday. I really hate her friend and feel like I cursed myself by making this thread. Her fat friend is literally meeting up with some faggot from tinder (or something  I think thats what its called) between now and then so hopefully she won't be thirsty and might not even come which would be sweet as fuck. Her fat friend is 24 tho and I really don't like her even though I already said that.

 I dunno, all I really think about is engineering scenarios with females, numbers, music and guns. When I type it out it's pretty cool but it's pretty torturous at times too
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: victimthrax on November 15, 2014, 09:14:04 pm
2 sick/didn't dick

We text like everyday though. I dunno, I have a feeling I'm gonna regret fucking her but I'm not 100% sure so gonna have to see
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 15, 2014, 09:17:37 pm
You're talking about the fat one, right?
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: victimthrax on November 15, 2014, 09:23:17 pm
lol, no, I can't stand the fat one, the bisexual 20 year old is kinda naive and trashy and from probably the shittiest place within 200kms but renounced her citizenship from there and literally goes by her middle name as opposed to her first one for some reason. She's kinda boring and I have to act all fake pussy instead of "omg stfu no one gives a shit so get yer mind right" but she means well. I dunno, it's hard to explain. She's a sweet girl with a bangin bawd and a youthful face who doesn't mind guys who are 7 years older than her so I dunno why I'm even whining. I also feel like posting this thread somehow "cursed" me/her

fuck
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: victimthrax on November 15, 2014, 09:27:11 pm
Hey sigma you're a fucking faggot

Now delete this whole fucking thread please
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 15, 2014, 09:33:46 pm
Good luck, man. The curse is just in your head because you're afraid of commitment and closeness. Give her a chance.

Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: victimthrax on November 15, 2014, 09:42:21 pm
Good luck, man. The curse is just in your head because you're afraid of commitment and closeness. Give her a chance.

If this post isn't cyberbullying I don't know what is
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: JasonVorhees on November 15, 2014, 09:45:49 pm
have 3some with fat girl and bi chick
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: RisiR on November 15, 2014, 09:48:32 pm
Good luck, man. The curse is just in your head because you're afraid of commitment and closeness. Give her a chance.

If this post isn't cyberbullying I don't know what is
I'm sorry.
Title: Re: This bisexual 20 year old at work and her fat friend want to drink
Post by: victimthrax on November 15, 2014, 09:56:31 pm
muh trust issues/cynicism