I'm a spiritual guru.
Quoted.
I bet you weren't even joking when you typed this. Just kill yourself. If I ever have the misfortune of ending up in Edmonton I'm going to literally teach you the sacred path of the warrior until you're a pile of bloody, sweaty tears. It will be cathartic. Depends how much energy I have that day though really.
On top I don't even know, it's all relative I'll try to think in sequential order
jerked off in class but apparently it was the thing to do at the time. Didn't bust
Fucked jew friends jew sister a few times. It was pretty sweet tbh. He was fucking furious when he found out but I regret nothing. She was 14 and I was 15. Fucked her 13 year old friend when I was 16. Twas illegal in Canada at the time when the statutory laws were even more liberal than they are now.
Cheated on gf with her friend extensively then one time we were cocaining and went to the aforementioned friends apt at like 9am and she took out all these dildos and we were obv getting ready to have a 3some but then this black guy showed up so I was like "k I'm going home to sleep" since I'd been cocaineing for days. I went home and tried to sleep for like 5 minutes and my gf showed up crying because her friend beat her up and with a broom (which I actually told her to before because I thought she had something to do with me getting robbed, which she actually didn't lol, sry bb) and I consoled her then fucked her while trying not to laugh. Never got to sleep that day which was the most annoying part. ex gf is the worst of the worst but I still think of her sometimes. Ugh.
Got head in the same room as a sleeping infant by the mother of the year. It was my friends baby mama too. I dunno if these are so perverted, more just degenerate and sketchy.
Licked my own cum out of a pussy. Multiple times.
Fucked with the blinds open in the middle of the day in objectively le hood.
God head from a girl then stole a new sword she had because I went through a phase where I really liked swords. Like I said, most if not all of these are degenerate, not perverted.
Actively try to cum in girls eyes whenever they let me bust on their face. Never achieved satisfactory vision impairment. It would genuinely bother me if I didn't eventually damage a girls eyesight with my cum, like direct cornea scratch level.
Cum on girls stomachs/all over so they have to get in the shower and I can fuck them again
I could go on but it'd get too Freudian and I had to delete some stuff. I dunno what to do. I'm gonna fuck a 20 year old tomorrow or the day after and she's likely not as fucked up as me. I doubt she'd even let me spit in her mouth at first. Gross
