Heard through the grapevine that this hot 20 year old waitress at work has a crush on me, not sure if trap or if girl in question has suffered recent head trauma.
Stop dwelling on the negative so much. You're well received online at least, your jokes and comments make people laugh. Whatever problems you have can be at least be improved if you really try, if you find the right thing. Do some research and find what works, what's best for you, and create a plan.
Looks? I've thought about buying direct from China, high quality and tasteful, refined, without the enormous markup, paying for the brand name, you would in the US. There are good non-homo sources for information on male fashion advice, something to suit the look you're after.
Face? There's a lot you can do with hair. I've thought about removing the pointy rise from my eyebrows because it makes me look so much angrier. Even makeup; yes, it's really no big deal, you could apply a simple foundation to hide imperfections and make your skin look healthier.
Body? I could recommend a few key cheap supplements to improve your health, help lose fat, gain muscle, improve sex drive, generally all the things that come along with better overall health. Weight lifting? Since you're a beginner, 2 or 3 times a week, and you'd only need a few key exercises. Relatively short sessions too, most of the time is spent resting between sets and exercises and due to being a beginner you'd have lower overall volume. You'd also see see rapid gains, "noob gains". Remember that most people are stupid, lazy as shit and don't fucking read (good material), so it's no surprise they don't succeed. If you still have elevated testosterone, it could make things even better.
And you have a wide variety of drugs to choose from for improvement. Anxiety? gabaergics, beta blockers, maybe even oxytocinergics. Energy? Stimulants. Cognition? Piracetam and nicotine.
Personality?
When you focus so much on the negative you see in yourself and only see the idealized versions of peoples' lives they present to others (life on facebook) it can become easy to forget just how bad the vast majority of humanity really is, in terms of quality, of their development and ability as conscious beings. There are good books with advice that aren't feelgood mainstream pop-psych bullshit:
http://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Anyone-Success-Relationships/dp/007141858X
