Example.. Today I seen this guy on the boulevard between oncoming and incoming traffic on the highway at the edge of the city, where there is a light. Anyways, he had a sign saying, "Traveling, and hungry... Help??" I looked him over, he was either really a traveler on hard times, or a very dedicated con artist. Worn out shoes and clothes, dirty, backpack with sleep roll on the back, bottle of water hanging from hip, a couple sweaters tied around his waist, ect, ect..
I drove past. Though, a few minutes later I thought, well maybe I should have helped him, I can afford it... So I looped back around, and came up to him again, called him over, and gave him a $20 bill, he seemed like it was the best thing ever, he almost started crying it looked like lol, "FUUUUCK YEAH MAN! This is a real supper tonight!" He started to walk away, I called him back, asked him if he smoked, he said yeah, so I gave him about 5 cigarettes too, and then I asked again, "do you smoke?" making the universal sign of somebody puffing on a joint. Again, "Fuck yeah man." So I gave him this little vial with like .5 of bud left in it I had left over from the day. I probably made this fuckers week with my generosity.
Here's the thing. I don't really give 2 shits if that guy went to bed cold and hungry or not, sure I can empathize with the situation, and even feel sorry for him. Yet, I really don't care, he's some random fucker ill never see again. I didn't go back because I wanted to help the guy out, not really... I went back because I thought, "Hey, if I help that guy, I can feel good because I did something good for somebody else!"
His satisfaction meant nothing to me, only my own...
Is that still a good deed? Does that make me a bad person?