The Sanctuary

Ego => Half Baked => Topic started by: Lanny on November 14, 2014, 07:33:08 am

Title: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Lanny on November 14, 2014, 07:33:08 am
So I was on my way back from this show and it was pretty good and I pregamed because fuck paying for drinks but the venue is kinda famous for their strong drinks so like 3/4 of the way though I was at risk of sobering up so I was like "fuck it, let's see if the rumors are true", and shit they were, ordered a rum and coke and it was basically a tall ass glass of rum and I'm not complaining or anything but I wasn't walking fully straight on my way out. So on my way home I saw this mcdonalds the stop where I usually get off, I had known about it for a while but never went partly because I'm poor but mostly because I try not to eat total shit but like I said I was kinda drunk and that sounded pretty good so I hopped off and went in because what's the point if you can't eat shitty food sometimes right? So I order a double cheese burger, large fries, and a drink. Basic bitch kinda meal but w/e. But as I was eating it, holy shit, it was like the best thing I had ever experienced what the fuck. Like I remember mcdonalds as a kid but it wasn't anything like this, this was the sensation of sex and glory and the sweetest vengeance all rolled into a single billion calorie meal.

As I was sitting there eating those fries and burger and that ambrosiatic liquer called cocacola I asked myself if anything could be as worthwhile as that experience and I realized I didn't have an answer. For like $7 I had one of the most intense sensations of pleasure in my life. Like, I'm a person who defines myself by what I want to do, like I normally have a strong sense that I'm doing something important with my life and the reward for any sacrificed pleasures will eventually balance the scales but fuck, minimum wage fuckers can eat McD's. I realize my position will probably change when I'm throwing this food up, but at least temporarily my entire life outlook has been flipped by fast fucking food. God damnit.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Ragus on November 14, 2014, 05:48:55 pm
Now get high and go to mcdonalds
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Saint Hubertus on November 14, 2014, 05:51:54 pm
Now I gots to eat some mikyD
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Prometheus on November 14, 2014, 05:52:09 pm
I worked at McD. Haven't been able to eat there since.

True, I only intercepted the one floorburger, but the dishes and utensils were always filthy.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Saint Hubertus on November 14, 2014, 05:55:25 pm
I worked at McD. Haven't been able to eat there since.

True, I only intercepted the one floorburger, but the dishes and utensils were always filthy.

I must have eaten a fuck load of the aforementioned filth, cus that's my drunk food right there

Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Soso0 on November 14, 2014, 07:16:36 pm
I worked at McD. Haven't been able to eat there since.

True, I only intercepted the one floorburger, but the dishes and utensils were always filthy.
I've been there once after I stopped working there. I regretted my decision just as I was taking a bite out of a McChicken. Pros: It's cheap. Con: Everything
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Bewbees on November 14, 2014, 07:18:27 pm
I did so many nasty things when i worked there but i still ate 2 mcgangbangs everyday anyway.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Lanny on November 14, 2014, 09:08:36 pm
I mean, how could you not?
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Bewbees on November 14, 2014, 09:17:45 pm
Right, its free and im poor as fuck+i got free school lunch it was literally the best time of my life
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: -SpectraL on November 14, 2014, 09:19:15 pm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYyDXH1amic
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: RestStop on November 14, 2014, 09:34:58 pm
It only tasted like that because you were drunk.

Sources: Drunk for 7 years straight.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: mashleshmash on November 14, 2014, 11:19:35 pm
It tastes quite tasty while stoned too.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Dumpster Slut on November 15, 2014, 12:18:51 am
So I was on my way back from this show and it was pretty good and I pregamed because fuck paying for drinks but the venue is kinda famous for their strong drinks so like 3/4 of the way though I was at risk of sobering up so I was like "fuck it, let's see if the rumors are true", and shit they were, ordered a rum and coke and it was basically a tall ass glass of rum and I'm not complaining or anything but I wasn't walking fully straight on my way out. So on my way home I saw this mcdonalds the stop where I usually get off, I had known about it for a while but never went partly because I'm poor but mostly because I try not to eat total shit but like I said I was kinda drunk and that sounded pretty good so I hopped off and went in because what's the point if you can't eat shitty food sometimes right? So I order a double cheese burger, large fries, and a drink. Basic bitch kinda meal but w/e. But as I was eating it, holy shit, it was like the best thing I had ever experienced what the fuck. Like I remember mcdonalds as a kid but it wasn't anything like this, this was the sensation of sex and glory and the sweetest vengeance all rolled into a single billion calorie meal.

As I was sitting there eating those fries and burger and that ambrosiatic liquer called cocacola I asked myself if anything could be as worthwhile as that experience and I realized I didn't have an answer. For like $7 I had one of the most intense sensations of pleasure in my life. Like, I'm a person who defines myself by what I want to do, like I normally have a strong sense that I'm doing something important with my life and the reward for any sacrificed pleasures will eventually balance the scales but fuck, minimum wage fuckers can eat McD's. I realize my position will probably change when I'm throwing this food up, but at least temporarily my entire life outlook has been flipped by fast fucking food. God damnit.

i read the first 3 words of this post. I could instantly tell the rest of it was not worth my time.
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: mashleshmash on November 15, 2014, 12:32:29 am
Well you missed the whole thread, then.  Get the fuck out
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: JasonVorhees on November 15, 2014, 12:43:51 am
I don't like any white stuff on my mcpenis
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: kroz on November 15, 2014, 04:20:17 am
i like the spicy chicken and fries, but I'm more a jack n the crack/whataburger kinda guy


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giANmcx8bm8

^^^^this took place down the street from where i live
Title: Re: Existential Crisis at McDonalds
Post by: Lanny on November 15, 2014, 04:50:25 am
I can't do jack. I like I realize McDs isn't exactly gourmet but jack is a tier below even that. To each their own though.

Also that video is great. Fuck yeah USA